Sad and Lonely Otter.

I really miss Blue Fox.

He talks to other people on Facebook but he doesn't text me or call me back. Dude, this is really making me sad. I want to hear his voice again but why is he being so busy but can't even text me back~ :(

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Sad,
Otter

I Miss You Terribly.

Sigh. This loneliness is seriously eating me inside...

I miss Blue Fox like crazy but I know he's super busy, tired and all of that. I just want to hear his voice again and have conversations like we use to but I know he'd be too tired for that.

I feel so lonely that I could cry... I just want to dig a hole in the bed, cover it with blankets, build a pillow fortress and just stay inside and just hibernate and not think of anything else.

I have nothing to distract me or keep me busy thus the reason why I want to keep on talking to Blue Fox but I don't want to seem like a bother. :(

I really don't know what to do...

Work out? Sigh.

Depressed,
Otter

Finally, updates!

I don't even know where to begin...

Hours before I left Maryland, Blue Fox was arguing with his roommate on how I would get to the airport, but his roommate was saying that if he does drop me off, I have to pay $50! Which I don't have enough if I'm going to be traveling on my own. Since that wasn't going to happen, he basically told me to take the damn bus! I had to wake up at 5am just for this. Blue Fox can't drop me off at the airport because at 5am, he has to get ready for ROTC. And yes, he can't get off that because since he slacked so much last semester, he almost got kicked out and he really wants this so he's trying to show commitment. I was sad that I had to leave. So, we both woke up together and before I was going to leave, he hugged me. A really long hug and I told him, "Don't worry, I'm coming back~" and he said, "Mhm, just fix all the things you need to first..." and he also told me to text and call often. Sigh.

The night before I left, as well, I asked him to tell me how he feels because apparently, he's not telling me and he didn't want to express it because he feels weak but I got it out of him.

Lonely Otter

It sucks to not have someone to talk to at this time of night...

So, the guy that I'm insanely smitten over? Yeah, let's call him Indigo. For many reasons, one being that it's a little lonely too. It's not the kind that you approach immediately but you know it's calm and comfortable. Everyone knows it, sees it, sometimes doesn't care but always fall back on it. It's friendly, shy and sometimes mysterious. That's Indigo.

I may not know what has been said... But I know it doesn't feel good.

What am I doing to myself?