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January 11: Emily messaged Blue Fox again.

Well, it's more like, she added the first paragraph and the other two are mine. Lol. But this is what she/we said.

"i understand that you have priorities in your life, i understand everything that youre going through because i have done long distance for 2 years. the way you took my message was that i am worried and what not, but you took it the wrong way. as otters best friend, i want to help her and help you as well, help you both on something ive experienced, the hardships of long distance.

i know that you two can do it. i have a lot of faith in you guys... you are focusing on school and your career and otters doing the same exact thing, even if you guys are chasing the same goals but on different paths, you two can still be there for one another. you just have to make sure the communication is there... just because something doesnt go your way or if things arent so great, you dont junk the whole thing. its okay to have arguments, its okay that the other one nudges you a little, bothers you a little. its a part of being close to someone. 

otter has been working out and training for you, her and her air force career. shes determined and youre still her motivation up until now... i know that she can wait for you because she loves and cares about you that much. shes patient and understanding and doesnt ask for much and i know that you can wait for her, im sure you still love and care about her as well. shes wanting to stick by your side and im sure you would want her to be there for you and be there with you and she would definitely want that too. you two are each others motivation, you texting her makes her smile and when she replies to you, i bet that makes you smile too and keeps you motivated, right? it's not that hard. you and otter are strong people, you guys can be strong together."

Blue Fox still hasn't replied, but I can't really tell because Facebook isn't like Myspace where it shows if a person has read the message or show their last log in... But all I saw was that he had a new friend on Facebook and was tagged in a photo from a churchmate. However, that new friend could have added Blue Fox (not the other way around) but hasn't had the chance to go online? Since he never goes online for a long time? But it's been four days, so, maybe he hasn't been on. I don't know.

But I miss him. A lot.

I've been waking up at like, 5am or 7:30am, work out right after I wash my face, eat breakfast, walk/run both Astro and Quazi and by the time I've already spent seven hours of my day, my "roommies" have just started theirs. And since I don't want to be in the house for so long because it's awkward and I want them to have their privacy (if you know what I mean) so I leave by 12pm or 1pm, and come back home at about almost 6pm. And what do I do? Walk. Where? No cares. I just... Need something to do, something to see and whatnot. And it helps the crazy thoughts I have in my noggin about Blue Fox...

Sigh. I have to walk the dogs so I will be back to blog again...

Sighing, hungry and aching,
Otter