Happy New Year

Just a few more hours til 2012.


HAPPY NEW YEAR.

Shout out to my fellow bloggers: Angie, Lorri and Blanche. :D

Christmas Break in a Nutshell

Recorded a few cover songs and re-recorded my first original. Definitely better.

Spent Noche Buena pigging out with my family in our ancestral home in the province.

On Christmas day, we bummed by having a movie marathon on TV. We watched: Fantastic Mr. Fox, How To Train Your Dragon (OMG I fell in love with Toothless OMG), Open Season, Shrek Forever After, and finally, Tangled.

The other day, I did my first video shoot for a very simple music video which won't be out on YouTube until late January or early  February. My mom's photographer friend wanted to expand his portfolio and I was his guinea pig for a music vid. I enjoyed it and he was quite creative even with nothing much to work on in terms of concept. It's for music video for my cover of Adele's "Hiding My Heart".

Right after the video shoot, my friend suddenly invited me to a photo shoot. Her dad's photographer friends also needed to practice their skills. Pictures turned out well and I had fun catching up with my high school friend.

Nothing new with Hottie. But that's ok. I've compiled a lot in my gratitude list and it's been a pretty blessed year. :)

Will be recording a few more songs tomorrow.

Busybody,
Awkward Turtle

Music, Text and Holidays

I have a feeling that for the next few weeks until January 4, I'll be pigging out, spend hours in our family friend's recording studio and will have very little time on the interwebs.

Most likely I'll be spending my time connecting with people through text while munching away during my lunch break at the recording studio. Music, oh music. I've no dreams of being ridiculously famous, I just want to sing, perform and hope people appreciate my music. Must work hard. I'm such a bum sometimes.

Speaking of music, while eating at KFC with my school family, Van piped up that he really liked my original song. I threw him a suspicious look and said "weeehh." I only emailed the song to select people. Turns out Hottie had him listen to it the other day. (That same day they got caught swerving on their way to Megamall LOLOLOL)

Anywayyy...

Best part of Christmas for me---- FOOOOD.

 And now a Christmas video by Kev Jumba.




So glad I'm done with Christmas parties and shopping.

Awkward Turtle

"Di Ko Alam."

  How would I describe this day? GOD. So much happened! Anyway, my day started with me rushing to Taft to grab my money from Western Union and then buy a Christmas paper bag for the polo shirt I was going to give Spencer. We met up at KFC and bought spaghetti with Coke.

 For those who really know me, I don't like to drink Coke or other carbonated drinks unless it's my only option. Root beer is a huge exception. I got my meal with soda because I know that Hottie didn't have enough money to buy anything at the establishment (there is a reason he's got a scholarship) and I figured he's kinda like me when it comes to food. When I sat beside him (out of my friends' forceful suggestion), I asked who wanted my Coke coz I didn't want it. He immediately volunteered since everyone else was good.

Yes, I bought drinks I didn't want on purpose. For him. (OMG WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME)

 We all exchanged gifts and we had a good laugh at each other. I didn't get my gift from CC until later when we were all at Prov, singing our hearts out.

 You know those moments when you just want to kill your friends because they know you like this certain person and they're doing everything they can for the two of you to have an opportunity to... I dunno, hook up?? While we were all crammed in this little karaoke room at Prov, they just had to have him sit beside me and of course push him closer to me that I nearly fell off my side of the bench.

 And when they were singing love songs, they kept inserting his name in the lyrics. I, of course, just laughed it all off with Hottie at the same time I took note of all the people I'm going to kill with a marshmallow.

 Of course, Hottie and I sang some songs together. I like singing duet songs with him because I LOVE his voice. It has potential if he wants to hone it someday. When he sings, I just wanna go ALKRJTHCNFREUIAAXMLKJXMB!!KJLFDH

 There was one time we were singing a song together and Van thought it would be cute if he entwined ourmicrophone cords with each other. TROLOLOLOL.

I love my friends. ♥

There was one event we were all just talking and suddenly they left me and Hottie in the room alone. OMG, Hottie and I were sort of surprised when they did that. It was like... What do they expect us to do??? It was somewhat awkward because... hello, are we to be like trained circus seals: to entertain them?

When Hottie stepped out of the room to take a ciggie (the only thing that ticks me off about it even if he's in the process of quitting- allegedly), Spam followed him outside while we continued to sing our hearts out. She asked him what was up with the two of us. His answer? "Di ko alam." Spam left it at that.

OMG WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?  He's not sure how he feels about me? He doesn't know what to do? Is that his polite way of saying that he doesn't like me that way? He doesn't know that I like him? BAKIT HINDI NYA ALAM?

And now to drown my sorrows in food: rice and canned tuna.

But first, a lovely song that I'd dedicate like to dedicate to Hottie because I am such a pathetic, awkward creature who hasn't the slightest idea how to hook up with anyone.





Sadly, I still like the dude. And overall, he was really nice about everything that happened.

Awkward Turtle

Van Gogh and Spongebob Boxers

 Hottie and I were suppose to meet up at Greenhills (he lives quite close to the area) around 11 or 12, but he asked if we could meet up around 1pm instead. I said "sure", since it'll give me time to window shop and figure out where in the tiangge area I could buy Spencer a good polo shirt.

 It was 2pm and he wasn't there at Promenade where we were suppose to meet. I was beginning to feel that he ditched me or something. 20 minutes later, he texts saying he just woke up and was "so sorry". I told him to hurry up and not keep a lady waiting.

 Almost around 3pm, he says I have to step outside of Fully Booked coz security wouldn't let him in for some reason. I quickly went out and there he was carrying a rather big book. He gave it to me and smiled, "Merry Christmas!"

 I stared at him in disbelief. "What's that?" I took the book and was blown away. It was a book about Van Gogh and his works!

 OMG I HAVE TO KILL HIM NOW BECAUSE HE KNOWS MY WEAKNESS!

 On top of that, he gave me a set of his slightly used pastels. PASTELS. My first favorite medium!

 I don't know about you but this is the best apology-slash-Christmas-gift EVAR.

 He said he was really sorry that he kept me waiting because he was up all night working on his projects for finals. I was like, "Don't you get it?? You have to die now because you know my love for Van Gogh!! You're forgiven!!"

 While waiting for Spam and Coco Crunch, I asked him to show me where OB Montessori was, and the building of their condo. Wow. He only lives 3 minutes away from everything. Then he showed me the ice cream place just outside the Greenhills area when Spam texted me that they had arrived.

 We followed Spam and Coco Crunch to the food court area and discussed what gift we would get for our recipients. After being sidetracked by jewelry and whatever else in the tiangge, Spam bought Spongebob boxers and a shirt with a monkey banging cymbals design. I guess you could say her gifts to Poker Face were more of a statement than a thought. XD It was a good thing Hottie was there as our mannequin because we couldn't determine the sizes of the shirts. One stall could be size large when it's actually a medium.

Then off we went for that stall with the awesome polo shirts. I had Spam pick out a good one for Spencer and even had a little debate that one of the polo shirts was too big until we tried it on Hottie. It was actually a good fit.  LOL. I just hope it will fit Spencer nicely.

 It was a bit annoying that Spam and Coco Crunch kept giving me hints to "take our time" and "go around by ourselves" that I finally told Hottie that we should go back to the friggin' food court or something. So we went to V Mall and went to the Astrovision store where we browsed at DVDs for movies he could download.

 Then we went to food court to see Spam and Coco Crunch. Eating. Again. Trolololol.

 We snacked and rested for awhile. Spam's friend Velvet came by since she also lives around the area.

 Pretty soon we were walking on our way to the MRT station. Spam and Coco Crunch were driving me nuts when they insisted that they'll just walk behind us...like, ten feet away??

My day didn't start the way I expected it to be, but it was perfect all the same. ♥


Swimmingly well,
Awkward Turtle

GOOD GOD

 I've got rhinos stampeding in my stomach as I get ready to go to Greenhills for a little Christmas shopping for tomorrows exchanging of gifts with my school family.

 GOD, please don't let me be so derpy in front of him. Or clutzy. Or boring. Or too hyper.

Sincerely,
Awkward Turtle

Mannequin

For my "school" family's exchange gift thing, I had drawn Spam's crush (Spencer) from the hat (or wallet, rather) and so I figured that the guy could use a nice polo shirt. Coz when we went to his birthday last October, his mother kept nagging him to change his shirt for his party. And the only time I saw him wear a polo shirt was once and he totally looked awesome in it.

 Spam agreed that he could use a preppy polo shirt to wear to school but my problem is I'm not sure what his size is. The person I know who has probably the closest body type and size to Spencer is... Hottie.

 "You know, he does owe you one." Spam reminded me.

 And that's when the floodgates opened.

I texted him, "hey, remember when you told me that you owe me?"

 He replied, "no! Just kidding. Why?"

 To make a long story short, Hottie will be my mannequin while we scout around Greenhills for that polo shirt for Spencer. And no, it's not a date! We are two friends doing Christmas shopping. And to think I still have finals later in the afternoon. Woooh. I can do this.

Fidgety for Thursday,
Awkward Turtle

Oh look webcam!

 So the other day, it was just me and my little brother at home. We were just bored, going through Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, and even started filling out our family tree at myheritage.com (which is an awesome website if you're into family trees). It was fun trying to remember all our ancestors, which relative is which.

Then I decided to check my email for the powerpoint my groupmate emailed me. As I opened my Yahoo! mail, my chatbox settings went to life. It was my dad, asking if I was online. No, I'm hunting for gazelles.

It was 2am at his time in LA. He was about to hit the sack when he saw me go online. Apparently, he just got his new laptop. The first question I asked him was, "does it have a built-in webcam?"
 He said yes. So without warning, I pressed video call and started accessing his webcam.

And voila! Video chat with mon papa!!

Technology is awesome.

Daddy's little girl,
Awkward Turtle


P.S. Otter can't update us because she is laptop-less as of the moment and isn't sure when she'll be able to have a new one. But don't worry, she's ok and still breathing. :D

Another Song For Otter. LOLOLOL.

Only because I feel this way right now.

What do you do
When your hearts in two places?
You feel great but you're torn inside.
You feel love but you just can't embrace it,
When you found the right one at the wrong time.

Another Turtle Post

  Today, I went to the art campus to return Hottie's journal. My adorable, huggable friend Koala followed, with her friend Jopay. LOLOLOL. They both wanted to see Hottie in person. I texted Hottie that he should text me as soon as he's done with class. He eventually texted, "where has you?" I see that my LOLCAT grammar is rubbing off on him too. Made me LOLZ.

 I had him go down to the lobby. When he arrived, I introduced him to my friends, and Koala immediately went... koala on him. LOLOLOL. It was so adorable!! It just made my day seeing Hottie being hugged by Koala like there's no tomorrow.

Like, can Koala be my daughter, and Hottie be the dad?

Well, no harm in dreaming. For some reason, Hottie's style was so DERPY today. I dunno why. His style is usually like preppy casual, or the hunky jeans-and-tee going on but today was just... Derpy derp derp with the polo 3/4 sleeve and washed out elephant-ish jeans. I just crush him all the more.

Swimmingly well,
Awkward Turtle

Once Upon A December

 December has been good to me lately, mainly because:

*Yesterday, I got to commute home by LRT and MRT with Hottie. Everything was just friggin' funny from Taft all the way to our stops. He was already tired from school. Quite sabaw. Thing is, he's hilarious even when he's dead tired. He's like a restless little kid who says the most random thing. We talked about the shadowplay, Fuente Ovejuna and all its memorable scenes, parents on Facebook, the youtube vid dubbed as one of the best wedding proposals- his cousin was the guy who proposed, etc.
I didn't expect we'd commute home together. It just so happened he wasn't so busy with theater since finals week was approaching and I already planned to go home after I borrow his journal.

While waiting at the platform...
Him: I wanna go home.
Me: But we are going home!
Him: (stands near edge of platform, preparing to jump) the train!!

OMGLOL.

 We high-fived when we manage to get seats at the MRT. We were so talkative and just kept laughing and laughing until he had to get off at his stop which was just two stations away from mine.

Him: Stop talking, you're hurting my braiiin.
Me: (silent)
Him: So kamusta ka naman?
Me: Bitch. XD

*My mom visited here in Manila and brought our yaya with her. So for nearly a week, I went home to a warm meal and I didn't have to clean up after. More downtime, more time to practice my songs, and more time to chill and bond with my mom. Accompanied her to Human Nature last weekend where she went crazy with all the organic products that she was gonna sell to her friends and contacts back in the province. She also bought organic products from Milea, as well organic honey.
I love the organic honey. I consume spoonfuls of it each day.

*I am obsessed with grounded cinammon. I put it in my champorado, tea, milk, coffee... it's just HEAVENLY.

*Was suppose to go to the Yule ball, but due to unforeseen circumstances and random opportunities that cannot be turned down, I decided to prioritize my music first.

*Got my EAF and I didn't have to stand in line very long for it. Then went to SDA for my weekly hangout with my friend Chi. We watched a romantic comedy through her laptop. "Keeping The Faith" starring Ben Stiller. Loads of laughs!


December is my darling.

Awkward Turtle

Turtle Tweets

"I like turtles because they're so chill. They don't hurt anyone. They're just like, "hey man, I want to swim, and maybe eat some lettuce.""

-Tweeted by girlpost a.k.a. Nikita

But otters can do the river dance!


Awkward Turtle

WHAT IS AIR.

Yesterday, I was with Spam and Aslan at the art campus'library. I was waiting for Hottie coz he was returning the guitar amplifier to me.
 
  When he finally arrived (OMG MUST KEEP CALM) he stuck around for awhile to talk to us. I mentioned to him how I got my ticket at the booth during their Fuente Ovejuna play and how the lady had no idea what I was talking about. He said he was sure he mentioned it. Then he said that he looked for me after the play and when he couldn't find me, he concluded that I had immediately left. (Cue Spam who turns away trying to hide her kilig)


   Well I did leave immediately because, you know, a girl's also busy. And stuff. Hohohoho. Actually, I did want to stick around after the play ended and congratulate Hottie on another great job but I figured- it's totally awkward if I approach him among his production crew and I don't know a soul there. Besides, why should I look for him?? All the same, I still blush and figuratively roll everytime I recall it: HE LOOKED FOR ME!! lsakdjafhklafhdkjfhsdjkghfdsjkl

Okaaaaay, guitar amp totally worth the trouble ZOMG.

Awkward Turtle

Smart Turtles! What About Otters?

Embryonic turtles communicate to coordinate when they hatch?!

Apparently, Murray River turtles communicate with their siblings while they are still in their shells, buried under the soil, in order to coordinate when they hatch.

Achieving this synchronicity isn’t easy. Although the eggs are always laid at the same time in the same nest, those at the top of the nest near the sun-drenched soil develop much faster than those buried deeper in the cooler soil. However, Murray River turtles are able to tell whether their fellow hatchlings are more or less advanced and adapt their pace of development accordingly, allowing the slow-coaches to play catch-up.

The team concluded that the embryos must be able to communicate with each other while they are still in their shells, but it’s not clear how. They suggest that it could be down to changes in the nest that trigger certain hormones that change the turtles’ metabolism. Embryos produce more thyroid hormone when oxygen levels fall. The fast-developing embryos could use up the oxygen levels around the next and emit more carbon dioxide. The reduction in oxygen could cause the slower developers to produce more thyroid hormone and therefore grow faster.

Geez! I’m inspired. When’s the last time you put that much effort into cooperating with your siblings? Sadly, I'm the only child but you know what I mean!

Things I Do For Love *sigh*

 Last week, Hottie texted me saying that their production crew for the school's theater show was in a bit of a pickle. They needed a guitar amplifier tomorrow morning (he texted Sunday evening) and the school's art department denied lending theirs. Which is odd and stupid at the same time.

Usually, in these last-minute emergencies, I already consider a lost cause. Besides, who'd lend their guitar amplifier for a week?

But since it was Hottie who needed my help, I exhausted more than half of my contacts and finally found someone who was willing to lend their guitar amplifier for the play the next day.

OMG the things I do for love. I'm beginning to think how pathetic I am. But there I was, going to the art campus on the 6th floor where final rehearsals for the play were on full swing, guitar amplifier in one hand. Spam had accompanied me that time and she was grumpy for reasons. LOL. When Hottie finally relieved me of the amplifier and left with a thank you, Spam was like, "yun lang?? Wala man lang hug or kiss??" (That's all? Not even a hug or a kiss??")

I'd like to think that I was able to help him out, even with something as insignificant as a guitar amp.

Last Thursday, he texted me that morning saying he got me two tickets for the play. Was suppose to watch it with Spam but due to a series of unfortunate events, I ended up watching it alone. And from there I found out why they needed a guitar amplifier.

Yup. Would totally make an awesome girlfriend. But not now.

The play was AWESOME, in case you're wondering. Totally worth the trouble.

Awkward Turtle

Video Games, Boys and Whatnots.

No calls for jobs. No calls for the Air Force. I'm running out of money. Sigh.

But since my best friend's boyfriend has been back into our apartment, it's weird. Even though this is a studio apartment, we all three sleep on the same bed. Can someone say awkward? Lol. But sadly, it upsets my best friend that he's doing the same thing he does before he got kicked out. VIDEO GAMES. He can't even get the motivation to find a job for himself. The Japanese restaurant probably is going to call him because they probably found someone better.

It upsets me too because he allows two girls to do stuff for him like he's a dang child. A dang 24-year-old child who grows his own weed and is a damn pothead. Sigh.

Licorice won't be seeing me this weekend because he's going to a drifting (car) event and going to a Hot Import Night event. JEALOUS. Sigh. But hopefully, Sunday he has his car ready and fixed so we can go on more dates.

Surprisingly enough, Jell-O is trying to get with me. And by "get with me" as in, us being together.

Oh, Blue Fox. You dumbass. Contact me already, jerk. Sigh.

WOOH BUSY WOOH

Sorry I haven't been blogging as much as I should. I've been preparing and gone through Philippine Model United Nations Week. Basically, it's a simulation of a real United Nations: we're all divided into different committess, each of us representing a country and all we do is talk, debate, talk, debate until we come up with resolution papers to be presented at the final assembly regarding current international concerns or issues.

So this is the second time I've attended the simulation and it still confirms that I'm really not cut out to be a diplomat in the future because I REALLY hate anything that requires a lot of talking and debating and sitting around trying not to get on each other's nerves. Yes, it's romantic that we're all for international peace but reality is diplomacy is just a graceful way of protecting your country's interest while trying to appear- I dunno- unhypocritical?


***************************************

Also, I did the darndest thing last week.

Wapwap texted me: So are you game for Komikon (national Comic Convention usually held somewhere in Manila) tomorrow?
Me: Dunno yet. I'm kinda broke.
....
Me: Wait, is the author of the graphic novel "Elmer" gonna be there?
Wapwap: Of course!
Me: Hold a sec.

I text Hottie: Hey, can I borrow your copy of Elmer tomorrow?
Hottie: Sure! Just tell me what time.

To make a loooong story short, Hottie suspected nothing as he lent me his copy of Elmer the next day.  I went to Pasig, met up with Wapwap there at Komikon, looked for the author (who is also recognized abroad as well), and have him autograph it.

 When I gave Hottie back his newly-autographed copy of Elmer, he didn't want to believe me at first! It was a good thing my friend Wapwap took a picture of the author signing his copy. I uploaded it on his fb wall and he was like "WOW!"

I'm totally convinced I'd make a fabulous girlfriend for anyone.

Awkward Turtle

New Living Conditions and Boys.

Best friend's boyfriend moved back into our apartment. Now, I don't know what to do. I mean, I'm not that awkward about it... But, they are in a relationship and I'm the third wheel and we're living in a studio apartment so things are crowded and also, he brought his "plants" aka weed and is growing it in a big ass tent in our bedroom and now they're smoking some and our place smells like weed. Lol.

I wonder how this new living condition's going to be...

Blue Fox, well... I still miss him. And tomorrow's Thanksgiving, I'm thinknig of sending him something.

And... I have two more dates and it's not with Licorice. I have one date with a nice fellow named Jell-O and Ravioli.

But Jell-O finally opened his feelings and said that he'd like to be with me... Sigh.

"I don't know how you can be mad cute, pretty, gorgeous, smart, independent, have good cooking skills and still be single like damn. Like, seriously? Do you think I got a chance? I know you're out of my league but still... I think if you gave me the chance and all, I'll work extra hard for it. I believe you're worth fighting for..."

Oh, Blue Fox. I wish you knew how many guys are trying to cop me right now...

Effing come back you jerk-y a-hole! T_T

Otter Cruz Is At It Again.

Uh-oh, my cousin Otter Cruz is at it again... Look what he said!

"WANTED: A young lady to keep this guy warm at night. Heat is expensive, I don't like wearing sweats, I refuse to hold my dog, and alcohol doesn't warm me up. Non-PYTs need not apply.

Also, out of towners are welcome...just not for too long."

LOL. Sigh. Why do my cousins write such dorky things?

More and more jobs. Sigh.

So, Farmer Brothers ran out of applications. Sigh. I'll try again next week or something.

Today, I went to University Ave./University Village to check out other places that I haven't tried yet. Sigh. I really need something right now... I need money.

Places that I've already applied to:
Jack In The Box
Bakers
K-Mart
Rubios
Yoshinoya
FatBurger

Pending Places/Applications:
Ranch One
Quiznos
Farmers Bros.

Need To Apply Online:
Subway
Starbucks
Juice It Up

No Application; Need A Resume:
Sushiya

Not Hiring At The Moment:
Stater Brothers
Flame Broiler
Busy Cafe
Teriyaki Bowl
Ray's Pizza
Mediterranean Palace

Jobs, jobs and more jobs.

Yesterday was a productive day, I went out to find a job. I walked around and tried to apply, all the little stores that I tried were not hiring because since they're a small business, they don't need a lot of people.

So I dropped by Bakers (a fast food place) and Jack In The Box and asked for an application. I filled it out and went on to the next place~ I tried Subway and Starbucks but they all said that you need to do it online. K-Mart does that too... I even tried Stater Brothers (a grocery store) but they said that when they hire, they will post up a sign and you get an interview on the spot but they aren't looking for anyone at the moment. Sigh.

So today, I'll go to K-Mart and do a computer application at the store. And then I'll come home and apply for Subway and Starbucks.

After leaving Stater Brothers with honey, sesame seeds and pumpkin pie, I come home and Emily's still studying. And as a lovely best friend of 15 years, I decided to make dinner again. This time: Korean dinner! I've made her grilled salmon with lemon-herb wild rice and this time, I made her bulgogi-lettuce wraps. She loved it! I'm so happy.

TAKE THAT, BLUE FOX. I CAN COOK. Now, schedule our cooking competition.

Actually, I should be getting ready to look for more jobs. I'll try K-Mart and Farmer Brothers. Hahahaha.

Talk to you later!

- Otter

It Rings In My Ears All The Time.

Kitty: You and Blue Fox. I knew it. I so knew it~ I knew you two would be perfect with each other, I just knew it. It was just in a matter of time... I deserve a pat on the back~ Mmm, Mrs. Blue Fox. That has a really nice ring to it, don't you think?

Sometimes, when you leave for your classes and all the roommates are gone, I slip into your Army ACU's and think about all the things that you wanted us to do in our lives, thinking about all the things you said about us having babies, how much you love and care for me, how you love that I'm now in your life, you being there for me 'always and forever' and how you'll always be by my side. I remember all the promises that I've made and you know that I'd always keep it. You know that I'll always be here for you no matter what...

People had really high hopes and knew that we were perfect for each other... Well, Blue Fox and I already knew that but it was nice to know that people thought so too.

As much as I have Licorice around, I still want Blue Fox. Licorice and I talk almost every day, especially before we sleep but before I fall asleep, I'm thinking about Blue Fox. I wake up to the thought of him and I sleep with the thought of him... As sad as some people say it is, I'm still waiting. I know a lot of people don't want me to and want me to move on even with doubts, I'm still waiting. I'm keeping myself busy by finding a job, being around Emily and Astro and having company such as Licorice but in my heart, I'm still waiting.

"Don't call or text until I do..." is the only thing that's keeping me going. Unless he's a complete fob, he won't know what this means but since he's obviously not, it'll happen... Eventually. Sigh, I don't know.

Emily: I really do have a lot of faith in you and Blue Fox, I really do!

Sigh. I'm still waiting...

Context

 About a week ago, at the dance studio, I asked one of the owners, Meera, how her little girl was doing because her daughter had a fever for two days now and she took her to the hospital just to make sure it wasn't anything serious. She had her daughter vaccinated as well.

Daughter: (in tears) You told me it wouldn't hurt! You lied to me!

Meera: I didn't say that! I said you'd live through it!

ROFL-ing,
Awkward Turtle

GRAH.

 Yesterday, my cellphone got stolen at the LRT. I'm pretty sure because I was listening to music through my phone while I was at the platform. When the train arrived, I placed my phone inside my bag and boarded.
By the time I got to school, I looked for my phone because my school ID was in the cellphone casing with it. That's when I realized.... FUCKITNIGGABITCHASSHOLE my phone's GONE!

So I was depressed the whole day because my mom bought me that phone as a birthday gift and it's the type of phone I've been wanting so bad for several months. ARGH. Totally heartbreaking.

At least it's an excuse for me to not text Hottie. Hohohoho.

So now I gotta save up for a new phone now.

Rolling in the deep,
Awkward Turtle

Toilets Are Not My Hobby.

Me: Sorry, our toilet's a little noisy...
Licorice: Yeah, a bit. It's a little annoying.
Me: We tried to have someone fix it yesterday but they didn't come.
Licorice: Let me check it.
(Tries to take a look...)
Licorice: Yeeeeah, I don't know.
Me: HAHA, it's alright.
Licorice: (lays down)
Me: You know, I think our toilet's like a self-flushing toilet.
Licorice: Haha, what? Why?
Me: Because yesterday, I took one square of toilet paper and threw it in the toilet. Two minutes later, it's gone. And you can see the running water push the toilet paper to the back and it's like flushing without really flushing!
Licorice: (laughs out loud)
Me: Don't laugh! It's not like I do this as a hobby! I was just checking the toilet!
Licorice: (laughs out loud)
Me: What's so funny?!
Licorice: Just the way you said it... (laughs)

Licorice, IHOP and Gray Areas.

Yesterday was 11/11/11, I thought it was cute. But since it's been almost six weeks since Blue Fox and I spoke, I decided to text him an inside joke... Knowing that we haven't talked this long, I knew I couldn't expect anything but there was a little bit of hope that he would send me something.

Where art thou love life?

 Newsflash: Panda is dating someone. I dunno who and I don't really care. I'm just glad he's preoccupied with something else aside from his computer games.

And nothing new with Hottie. Just our usual gratitude updates. Then again, I'm the one who has to keep initiating it. Siiiiiiggggghhhhhh.

Where art thou love life?

Awkward Turtle

The Date Aftermath.

So my date with Licorice was pretty good, I actually had a great time.
The end.

Paycheck and Licorice.

So, I got paid today and I’m suppose to celebrate, right? Wrong!

Since I am suppose to get $600/month, this tweaker decides to give me $366 and what’s her reason? A deduction of my plane ticket!

OHMYGOD, WHAT THE PISS! SHE DIDN’T EVEN PAY FOR THE DAMN PLANE TICKET! HER BROTHER DID! (who’s my mother’s sister’s husband)

… I knew it. I knew this family was greedy as (beep)~ Ugh! Conniving (beep)! And the deal from the beginning was that I’m going to get $600 a month and my mother already discussed with the brother-in-law and the whole family that the plane ticket will not be deducted from the $600! SO WHY THE (beep) DO I STILL HAVE LESS THAN $600?!

Seriously?! (beep) $366?! That’s only 60% of my actual pay! Such a (beep) rip off! I USE TO MAKE $600 IN LESS THAN A WEEK AND NOW THIS IS JOB IS MONTHLY! GIVE ME MY FULL $600!

Yes, I don’t care nor have any concern for your mother. I know that you’re fully aware that your mother is a grumpy old (beep) and you say you understand where I’m coming from but I know you don’t. You keep pressuring me to do everything your mother wants me to do even though it’s not in the job description and you tell me that I have to do things ‘voluntarily’ for her. You’re such an idiot, do you not know what ‘voluntarily’ means? I’ll volunteer when I feel the need to and with your mother, she sure as Hell doesn’t deserve it.

I hope she chokes to death or drops to the floor again!

Ugh! I hate these people, always have and always will. They did nothing but horrible (beep) to my family but I still had to do this for the sake of money. Sigh~ Oh, money… Why do you have to be so important?

I’m trying to leave tomorrow or Monday to live in with my best friend. Hopefully, I can get a ride to Riverside soon. Sigh, I can’t be stressed right now… I have a date coming by in less than an hour and I need to eat something since I skipped breakfast, I also need to get ready and (beep).

UGH! I don’t even know if I want to go now because I’ll miss AH~ ㅠㅠ

Scratch that. Actually, wait. No. Don’t. Only because it’s true but I’ll still go because one, it’s a nice dinner date in Long Beach with Licorice. So, I’ll suck it up, go and be a good girl.

Sigh.

Otter Has A Date With...

Just when I wanted to run today, it rains. Then it stops, then I decided to go out and buy pizza, buffalo wings, some alcohol and just chill at home freezing my ass off... And then what happens? It rains again. So, I suck it up like a boss and walk in the rain with no umbrella and no coat. Um, BADASS? Yeah.

I wore my Navy PT uniform. (Thanks, dad) and walked in the rain and it was like, 48°F! Just breathing made fog come out of my mouth. But I sucked it up and did it...

I walked, bought pizza and buffalo wings at Papa Johns, some soda, some liquor and a few sticks of Slim Jims. Mmmm, perfect. And then I walk back home...

And then, I get a text from Licorice - Orange's high school friend - and he textes me about wanting to have dinner with me on Saturday night... Well, more like 4~4:30pm...

I asked what we'd be doing and where we're going so I can dress accordingly but of course, it's a secret because he's planning it. This is one of the reasons why I hate surprises.

I don't know what to wear!

So yes, heartbroken little Otter is going on a date with a nice boy named Licorice. But in my heart, there's nothing more than I want than to go on a date with Blue Fox... Since Blue Fox has never brought a girl out on a date before, I want to be the first. And hello, I'm still-kinda the girlfriend... Sigh.

I know that it's not fair for Licorice but... I love Blue Fox. Always and forever. I'm doing this just as a small dinner date, to get to know him, make a new friend and see what happens but I'm sure that I'll be thinking about Blue Fox the whole night there.

Update! Nevermind, I now know where it is... It's at a casual-elegant restaurant in Long Beach called "Tantalum"... Sounds like tantrum. (HAHA)

((( http://www.tantalumrestaurant.com/ )))

Now... I'm freaking out even more. I NEED TO FIND SOMETHING TO WEAR!

Sigh. What am I going to wear?!?! I haven't been to an casual-elegant restaurant in a long time! Hmmmm...

This is making me feel even more sad... Because there are guys out there who are wanting me, waiting for me, want to bring me on dates, want to be my boyfriend and there are two guys that plan on wanting to make me their wifey... HUGE SIGH. Even though I have all these guys around me, I only look at Blue Fox; I only think of him, see him, love him. Sometimes I wish he knew how lucky he was... I know that he said that he was happy that I was with him and would be by his side and I know deep down he knows how lucky he is but he jokes that I should be the happier one because he's "perfect"... Well, sorry to break it to you Blue Fox but I'm perfect too. I just wish you knew how even more perfect we would be together IF ONLY we got through this rough patch...

Licorice is bringing me to a nice casual-elegant restaurant. See what kind of competition that Blue Fox has? But yet, somehow he wins me over with Asian mandarin salads for lunch and makes me some weird sausage-egg-jelly/jam sandwich with soggy-ish bread.

I just wish he knew...

STILL WONDERING WHAT TO WEAR,
Otter

.................. F*ck.

Seven hours ago, it was 5am. I just fell asleep for less than three hours...

Then my phone rings...

I pick it up and see that it's Blue Fox.

WHAT THE F*CK? BLUE FOX? (picks up)

(at this point I'm excited that he called because that gave me hope...)

"Hello?", I said.

(rustling sounds, male friend talking, Blue Fox replying)

"Hello?", I said again.

(rustling sounds, male friend talking, Blue Fox replying)

… My heart is racing, I’m nervous and I stay on the phone for two minutes, listening to him giggle at what his friend said while they’re walking and I realized that his phone is in his pocket again and it called me. This happened three or more times before and we were still talking to each other so I know that he wasn’t trying to be mean but… Sigh. It made me even more depressed that his phone called me and not him… I was hoping it was him.

I hung up the phone, retreated deeper into my bed, buried myself in my pillow fortress and tried crying myself to sleep but I just ended up… Crying.

I just really wanted it to be him, not his fucking pocket… And I keep crying about it because I was excited at 5am, thinking there was fucking hope. Crying at night and crying in the morning fucking hurts because the only person I want to talk to isn’t around; I can’t call, I can’t text, I can’t IM, I can’t do shit and it hurts… But why do I still have to strength to wait? I feel like I’m slowly losing hope but why do I still have hope?

I’m scared he’ll never call me again and I’m scared he won’t forgive me…

When I got the call, I picked up happy with my heart thumping through my chest and I was happy to hear his voice but I hung up, crying… Knowing that he didn’t know he called me and that I was staying on the line feeling happy. I hung up because he wasn’t aware…

Sigh, and here I go again… ㅠㅠ

Waiting, Missing, Understanding.

Half of me feels hallow and sad and the other half of me still has hope and strength to wait.

I understand that he’s busy; school, ROTC, work, friends. And I understand why he withdrew from me because of my rare moments of neediness.

I know that he was going through a situation that was tough for him… Juggling me, over school, work, ROTC, sleep and everything else in between, I admit that it could have been too much for him. Thus, why he withdrew…

Not-Much-Of-An-Update.

"But I can't read you mind
Not this time...
I just wanna know what you're going through
I don't feel wrong about asking you
But I can't read your mind
Not this time...

There are times when you don't wanna say
That there are problems in your head that you can't explain... I have been that way.
Baby there's a hunger, a kiss or two
But not forever do
If only I'd reach you..."

-------------------------------------------------------------

I know that I haven't been updating as much as I use to... I'm sorry. I just wish I could squeeze my thoughts onto here like a sponge but I feel like the thoughts in my head are spewing out faster than my fingers can type and it can't keep up. There's a lot on my mind and I can't seem to type it all because I end up losing motivation to do so. Sigh.

However, don't fret... I'll get to it. Actually, I think I'll be able to have the motivation later in the morning (it's currently 2:53AM) so I'll sleep - hopefully I don't cry tonight - and in the morning, I'll do a little updating.

Thank you, Turtle for making me cry with the "One and Only" song. Sigh.

I had a feeling that Hottie liked you but that's good that he didn't start anything with you since he's really busy and stuff. I'm glad but at the same time, I know how much you would want to start something with him already... But don't worry, there will be a chance for you and Hottie to get together and make some cute artistic babies. I can't wait!

Sincerely,
Otter

One and Only

This song is for me and Otter.

OTTER! I nearly cried when I listened to this.

Thanks to Spam who recommended this.

Awkward Turtle

Hottie Oh Hottie

Last Friday, it was our friend Cupcake's birthday, so drinks were on her. 

 Everyone was there, including Spam, JB, Spencer and Panda.

 Hottie was suppose to be there but the theater group had rehearsals- and with him being stage manager, he couldn't afford to skip it. Siiigh. Then again it would be reeeeally weird if both of my crushes would be there. I wouldn't know which one I wanna sit beside with.

 When I heard Panda was coming, I turned to his cousin who was seated beside me and I said, "MOVE!"

***********************************************

 During the drinking session, there was one point that Hottie's best friend, Van, was seated beside me. And I was like, "so, how's your friend?"

"You mean Hottie? He told me he likes boys now." Van laughs. Of course they were just kidding around. Then Van told me that there's this girl who is also crushing on Hottie and has been pulling off a couple of moves on him but Hottie doesn't like her.

"Coz the only moves he likes are mine!" I said. I think I've had a couple too much shots already. LOL. Anyway, I told Van that I'm hopeless because Hottie likes someone else.  And he was like, "oh no, he's not crushing on her anymore coz he saw something in her he didn't really like." I didn't ask for details as I took a swig of Red Horse. Then Van added, "The thing is, Hottie likes you too, but he doesn't want to enter into a relationship right now because he's really busy this term."

 I just nodded, thinking how he's maintaining his scholarship for the rest of his college days by taking up his responsibilities at the Cultural affairs department. Sucks vacuums.

I need a drink.

********************************************

 The day after, I was texting Hottie and I told him "I heard you were gaaaaaaay!"

 So of course now he's out to kill Van. 

********************************************

Two days ago, Spam was on her way to the train station just in front of the school when she saw Hottie at the bookstore. She went to him and teased him, "I hears that you like Turtle!" 

Hottie was like, "what?? WHO told you?? It was Van, wasn't it?? That guy talks too much, I swear! He's such a blabber...."

Gushing so much it hurts,

Awkward Turtle

Surprise Panda Hug

Two days ago, I took the train with Spam, JB, Spencer and his sister Smurfette, Panda and his best friend whom we shall call Scooter. It took forever to actually get on a train because it was rush hour when we got on the platform and nearly all the trains were full like sardines. I think we waited at the platform for almost like an hour.

  Spencer is just so random because in his bag he's carrying a loaf of raisin wheat bread and a jar of peanut butter, so Smurfette, Scooter and I munched on some bread, even if it wasn't allowed.

  Panda kept hugging his cousin Smurfette, messing up her hair and pinching her cheeks and nose til she curses and she starts poking him in the stomach, trying to get back at him. It's just so sweet and adorable the way Panda shows so much affection for his cousin. He's quite protective about her as well, going all, "WHO'S BODY ARE WE BURYING?" everytime one of us brings up a guy's name to her. And he watches over Spam and JB when they happen to be drinking where he's hanging out.

Anyway, us girls were just minding our own business. I just grinned at Smurfette coz she asked me what my height was since I was still taller than her even if she's wearing heels. I still call her Pokemon because she's just so sweet, thoughtful and adorable for a college freshman.

Someone suddenly hugged me from behind. Like, these two long arms just wrapped around my shoulders. I froze because they definitely don't belong to a girl. And I just KNEW who it was immediately. Spam, JB and one of our other friends who happened to be there, Tima- all of their eyes were wide in utter shock from what was transpiring before them but they totally suppressed their reactions to freak out and instead they all just pursed their lips tightly while throwing meaningful glances at me and each other, trying not to smile.

And my mind was screaming, "CALM YO TITS."

Panda chuckled, "oops! Wrong Pokemon." And promptly moved to Smurfette and also gave her a back hug. I was like, "hey!! I'm not THAT short!"

"Nah, just kidding. I knew you'd be offended." He chuckled, pushing the bridge of my glasses up my nose with one hand.

WHY DID I EVER FELL OUT OF CRUSH FOR YOU?

Loving back hugs,
Awkward Turtle

Allergies, Oh, allergies.

 Came down with a slight fever yesterday. I'm feeling tons better today, so I hope I'd be fully recovered without my allergic rhinitis getting in the way tomorrow because it's one of my close friends' birthday and drinks are on her. Not that I'm a drinker but my school family's gonna be there and I don't wanna miss that rare gathering over a stupid allergy.

Well, Otter. As your friend, do what you think you feel you must do. And I will try to be there, um, I dunno, cheering for you from afar. TROLOLOL. X)

Using up so much pulp from trees,
Awkward Turtle

I. AM. DONE.

I'm tired of taking people's punches, I'm tired of being nice to people and I know I'm as patient as f---.

But this old lady is getting on my last nerve! I'm here to only help her and assist her. Sure, I'm on the computer and I'm in the room but if she needs help, she can call me. It's a small house! But I was told that she was "lonely" at night or alone in the living room so okay, I moved all my stuff outside and now, we're only like 12-feet away from each other. I watch her and since she's still independent, I let her do what she wants but if I know she needs assistance, I'm there to help.

But she keeps complaining that I don't clean the house. I don't sweep the floor, I don't wipe the floor, I don't dust the ceramic pieces, I don't water the yard and front lawn, I don't do this and that... I'm not here to clean the effing house! That's not in the job description and that's not what was agreed on in the beginning.

It can't be. It's impossible.

I don't feel like talking right now but...

Seeking comfort from others do help, but of course, the only person that I seek to comfort me is Blue Fox. Yes, I still love him. Yes, it's been two weeks and three days since we spoke. Yeah, I texted him last Sunday saying "Hey I know you're busy but I just wanted to say hi and that I miss you. I hope to hear from you soon" but of course, no reply. Yes, he had a Ranger Challenge at Fort Pickett from Oct. 2nd~23rd. Yeah, I saw pictures and it made me miss him seeing him in his camo uniform, and I might not be sure if he still has midterms but the last time I checked his grades (yes I check his grades), it was a 3.2 GPA and when I checked last Sunday, it's now a 2.7 GPA, I guess some midterm grades were locked in. He has work, school, studying, ROTC and ROTC classes all on his plate... I can understand where the pressure is coming from and me, on top of it, just... Blew it off.

I suck at this

Otter, as your good friend, if you want my opinion, I will give it you in the best, unvarnished way possible. If he's really missing you- or if he's really into you as he says he is- time or distance should not be an issue. True, you get to know a person by spending time with them and it's more convenient if they're accesible, proximity-wise. But we have technology now. What's a few minutes of leaving a pm? Or a five-minute call saying he can't stay long on the phone but he misses you? As my professor in sociology said, "True love is beyond space, time, culture and religion." I had high hopes for Blue Fox, yes, but I was disappointed with the way he didn't seem to consider your effort to fly aaaaaalll the way to where he is, just to be with him. He may or he may never call but men are simple-minded creatures. If they like you, they ask for your number and ask you out. If they miss you, they call. Or leave a message. At this point, Otter, you have to ask yourself and consider the possibility of, I dunno, just focusing on yourself first. Find a stimulating job, get a place, use your talents in writing and the arts, volunteer for something you believe in... You know, just focus on doing things for yourself, and challenge yourself. Instead of using all your time waiting for Blue Fox, go back to yourself. Think of you. You've got way more opportunities there compared when you were in the Phil. You're an awesome person Otter! If Blue Fox is not willing to spend even five minutes of his life for you, that's something to think about. I suck at giving opinions and advice because I'm too straightforward. Wants to dance some more, Awkward Turtle

For Otter

Updates, yet again.

Otter!! Sorry I haven't been updating. Things are crazy on my end! Well, probably not as crazy as yours, but whatever.

What's been going on for the past few weeks in nutshells:
*I attended Panda's cousin's birthday in this HUUUUGE compound that's owned by their family. OK, so they're wealthy in an "old rich" sort of way. And yes, Panda was there. And he managed to persuade us to swim with them in their huge pool. What he did was he unleashed their pack of adorable beagles. So me and my friends smelled like dog from cuddling and playing with them. Thus, we were lent swimwear to have a valid reason to swim with them. XD T'was a fun night.


*I took up hip-hop classes and it was FUUUUUUUUUUUN. I took these classes to challenge myself. If I suck at it, then I can walk away. But I didn't. I don't actually have two left feet! And can I just emphasize what a total confidence booster it is to be able to rock out and learn moves!!

*One of my pet hermit crabs, Houdini, shed his exoskeleton again. Which is cool.

*Hottie is still... siiiiigh. What am I going to do with this guy who is unaware just how much he takes my breath away???

A Week of Waiting.

"At some point, some time, you'll need
someone there for you and I will be the one.
So whenever you need, don't be afraid, 

call on me, and I will get to you.
All you want, you need my time.
I wanna give because you're a special apart me.
See, I know you need many things to feel complete
that's why you should never hesitate.
No matter what you think,
I'm gonna always do things for you.

I will take care of you. My word is all you need. 

And you'll see that I, I'll never let you down."

I didn't think it was going to be this hard not to text him or call him. And I haven't heard anything from him... It makes me wonder if he misses me at all. But I know he does, he always does.

Sometimes, I see him online wondering why he's not sleeping. Sometimes, I feel like he's wanting me to say something first. I don't know, I can't assume. But he tends to do this like, he'll do something and if I comply, he'll wonder why I didn't call. Like, when he called me and made the conversation short, I complied and then he was like, "Aren't you going to call back?" or something like that. Again, I can't assume.

But oh, do I miss him. I miss him so much... It's almost like a physical pain I feel in my chest. I just want to talk to him, hear him, and just giggle again.

I'm trying to stay positive, I'm trying to make the time pass... If I get nothing at two weeks, I'm going to say something... Positive.

Ohmygod, I'm getting sad all of a sudden now...

I miss him so much. :'(

Sigh, Blue Fox. Come back...

I feel like when I do say something, I have to apologize for being such a burden to him. I didn't realize he was studying and going to class for midterms which was happening last week. Yes, he could of texted me about it but knowing how he works when he's busy, I won't fight it. I should have... Thought about it. I am sorry. Sigh.

Wait... Wait... Wait... T_____T

;skldjsklfsdsfj,
Otter

Day-4 of Waiting.

Ever since I was four years old, I've listened to Immature/IMx and this song is one of my favorites when they came back, all grown up and fine. This is the song that I've been listening to all day, thinking of Blue Fox. I miss him so much right now...

It's day-4 and I feel like... Siiiiiigh.

"Some days I wish I was your pillow
And I know exactly how you feel
Every night you cry it rained on me
(on your mind is where I want to be)"

I don't want to let you go, I can't let you go, I don't want to lose you. I just wanted to know how you were feeling because, like the song, I just want to be your pillow. (even though I know in real life, you don't use a pillow) but I want to be that person who makes you feel rested, someone who comforts you, someone who wants to know how your day went, someone who can ease your mind after a long day and I want to be your pillow especially on the days where you feel like crying or when you're frustrated, stressed, tired, upset or sad.

That's the kind of girlfriend/gumiho that I am for you...

Please understand that.

Day-2 of Waiting.

OMG, WHO KNEW THIS WOULD BE SO HARD?

I was so confident that I could do this because I know that we could work this out... But just waiting for him to text me is so hard, I just miss him, you know? If only voicemails didn't expire after 14 days, I would be calling my voicemail and listening to all his cute voicemails that I saved... Sigh.

I'm trying to keep myself busy. I need to sign some papers, study for the DMV's drivers test, helping the in-laws with their collage thing for their reunion and having my mind glued to some action dramas. I still think of Blue Fox even through all of this but I'm not hibernating in the bed, covered in pillows and blankets, messed up hair and crying myself to sleep. Although, if I don't keep going, I'll do just that.

Turtle, I have a question... What do you think of the situation? I know that you had high hopes for Blue Fox and I. So do I. What do you think?

Because for me, it's obvious. I want to work this out, I still want to be with him even though we have separate goals in life, I know we can do this. I know he has a stronger will than that, and I know I have a stronger will and patience. And I just love him that much. At the end of the day, I'm an adult and I know what I want... And I still want Blue Fox into my life.

Trying to stay positive,
Otter

Happy Music

"Rock my world into the sunlight
Make this dream the best I've ever known..."

So I haven't completely given up on Hottie. If only I were a guy and she was a girl, life would be easier. But nooooo... Anyway, the most recent event would be last weekend when I went to the Art department library again to drown my sorrows in art books and graphic novels.
  Just as I entered the library, I immediately saw him looking busy with his sketchpad. For some reason, I FREAKED OUT and quickly retreated to the Reading Room so that I could- I dunno- slow my heart rate??

 As I caught my breath and tried to calm myself, he suddenly appeared in the reading room and I just stared at him. He brought with him his sketch pad and his bagpack. He then started telling me that it was his break and he usually spent it in the library.

 Like I didn't know that!

He gave me back my sketch pad (which he found in the same library a week ago, coz I was in a sudden rush to go home. I call it Destiny.) and he lent me a bootleg copy of The Lion King as promised. So he spent what's left of his break just talking to me. Turns out we both watched this amazing movie called "3 Idiots" and that both of our older sibs forced us to watch the movie nearly at the same time. We talked about his art classes. I read his idea journal and one of the things recorded in it was the day that he hung out with me, Spam and Kitty at the main library. One of the passages said, "I hung out at the library with Spam, Kitty and especially Turtle..."

 ESPECIALLY???

I thought I was going to die when I read it. That was the day I consulted for him for what's a good concept for my music video in the very near future.


aslkjfhvbdfjknhsjkldcnhakLSH

I JUST CAN'T!

Awkward Turtle

I'll Wait In Time.

I'll make you fall in love with me the same exact way I captured your heart in the beginning. ♡

... You'll come back. You said you'll come find me. I'll be waiting.

Sincerely,
Gumiho (Otter)

I'm Forever Yours, Let Me Help You.

"Just know in my arms, you're embraced by love." ♡

Finally, the boyfriend called me. Final-effing-ly~ It may not be what I wanted but it's something, at least. But I'm going to be strong and patient.

Please... Talk To Me.

“A, please call me. Sigh. I need to talk to you…”
”Are you done with church? I won’t be going today. So, call me. Haha.”
”:( are you busy?”
”A, is there something wrong?”
”What’s going on? :(”
”What’s the matter? :(”

Called twice; one rejected, one no answer… Nothing.

”Are you too busy to talk to me?”
”Don’t be like this. What’s wrong? I’m being positive but why are you being like this? Tell me what’s wrong because apparently something’s up and the way you’re acting is really upsetting me.”

I called twice because he should be free right now (6PM EST) but he just let it ring to voicemail…

(Update this as it goes...)

What Is The Matter?!

At about 2PM (5PM his time) I ask about work, he tells me that he's about to perform at his Korean drum thing. I text him back saying, "Yay! Have fun!"

I call to leave a voicemail, telling him to call me.

8PM (11PM his time), NOTHING. No text or call in between 2PM~8PM. So I call him, he lets my call ring until it automatically leads me to voicemail. I wait five minutes to call again, HE REJECTS MY CALL AND PUTS ME STRAIGHT TO VOICEMAIL!

WHAT THE F*CK!

I just want to talk to him about this problem, I want to tell him that I miss him, want to hold his hand and hear about his day. What's wrong with that? Is that too much to ask for?!

God. I'm done for the day. I'm going to build a pillow fortress, bury myself in the covers and cry myself to sleep tonight while I listen to our theme song... I didn't eat all day because of him, but I ran for him, and worked out hoping he would call. Thanks. I'm done for today... I'm going to go cry myself to sleep now.

What Is Going On?

So I texted Blue Fox about how work was and he said, "Good. Did you run?" and I told him, "Yes." and he said, "How long?" and I told him that I ran for 25-minutes.

Blue Fox: Do another 30 too.
Otter: On top of my 25?
Blue Fox: Yes. Let me know when you are done. I'll call you then.
Otter: Right now?
Blue Fox: That's up to you. You're not going to run?
Otter: But it's dark outside. What if someone snatches me? I'll do it in the morning.
Otter: I did 175-sit ups and 85 push ups. Can't you just call?
Blue Fox: Nope. Not good enough.
Otter: Why not? Can't I just repay the rest in goodnight-kisses?
Blue Fox: You don't try your best. So no reward. I don't think you understand the importance of exercise. I want you to be on my level. That means you have to work harder than me. Minimum amount of running per day should be 1 hour.
Otter: Why?
Blue Fox: Why not. I hate people who complain so I advice you to not do that.
Otter: I'm not complaining. I'm just asking why I have to work harder...
Blue Fox: Well let me ask you this. Why are you exercising if you aren't gonna give it your best?
Otter: I am... And I'm working on it.
(Blue Fox doesn't answer)
Otter: What's wrong?
(Blue Fox doesn't answer)

... He most likely went to sleep instead of replying to me.

Seriously? As much as I love Blue Fox, why is he being like this all of a sudden? Why is he so obsessed with me running nowadays? Yes, I work out. Yes, I run every other day. Yes, I'm healthy as a BAMF. But why is he acting like this all of a sudden?

I told my best friend about it and she told me that it's probably because he's irritated about me being gone or something. She said that her boyfriend was being a dick when she was gone and when she was about to come over to visit him, he was being nice and whatnot. And now that I'm gone, Blue Fox is being like this. I don't know why... I want to talk to him about this one too. I know he's going to get upset about it because he'll think I'm complaining but I'm not. I'm just confused on why he's acting like such a dick all of a sudden.

"I hate people who complain so I advice you to not do that."

Seriously, what the f*ck...

I love you but I didn't ask for a trainer. If you want to act like a trainer, go to your fatass roommate Ryan and train him or a random fat student at the university? Why do you have to train your girlfriend who already works out on her own?

There has to be something behind this...

This is what happens when you date a Korean guy. They may be perfect, good-looking and athletic but they have this trait in their genes that make them almost like psychos where they always want to be the best and want to always improve to be better. And as much as I admire that, this is crazy. Yes, I agreed that we should do sports together and work out together but this is like a whole different story.

I didn't ask for YG's personal trainer... I asked for a supportive boyfriend.

Now tell me where he went because I miss him and I want him to call. Right now, I'm talking to the other side of Blue Fox. I want the original Blue Fox that I fell in love with... WHERE IS HE?!

I need to talk to him soon~

SADDDDDD,
Otter

FINAL-BLEEPIN-LY!

I texted him at 3:08AM my time, "(hugs) Do your best today! ^^ and I better hear from you~ Lol"

Almost two hours later, possibly when he comes out of ROTC... He textes me, "I was tired."

Otter: I know~ :T
Blue Fox: Don't give me those sad faces :P
Otter: I can't help it. (tries to hold in another sad face) you're just so busy that you can't even text me back or answer my calls for a bit...
Blue Fox: Stop being spoiled and be positive
Otter: Lol, ohmygod I'm not spoiled! XD I'm trying to be positive but it almost felt like you were trying to ignore me~ T_T
Blue Fox: I'm busy darling. You should know that. But if you are gonna think that way then I might as well ignore.
Otter: Noooooo! I'm just sayin'~ I just missed you and I wanted to hear you say that you missed me too. That's all. :P
Blue Fox: Did you run everyday?
Otter: Yes. Except the day before yesterday because there was a rain storm.
Blue Fox: How many minutes?
Otter: 20. -___-+
Blue Fox: I don't miss you at all then.
Otter: What?! Whyyyyyy?! Was that suppose to be negative motivation?!

His last text was almost five hours ago. Uhg. I know he's just doing this to motivate me but seriously...

He always says that he gives me negative motivation because he knows good motivation doesn't drive me to do better... He gives it to me when I do good but he gives me these negative  motivations... Sigh.

At least I got something. But now, he's busy again because he's most likely at work right now so... I hope he calls me later tonight. I HOPE.

Feeling A Little Better,
Otter

For realz, epic realz.

 Yesterday, in Economics class, which was largely made up of Freshmen, there was a group of girls in one corner blabbering about Steve Jobs.

Their conversation was in Tagalog but here's a rough English translation.

Girl 1: I heard that Steve Jobs passed away!
Girl 2: Yeah, he did resign from Apple earlier coz of cancer.
Girl 3: Who's Steve Jobs?

(pause)

Girl 1 and 2: You don't know who Steve Jobs is???
Girl 3: (shakes her head)
Girl 1: (waves her Mac laptop in front of her friend's face) He's the one who created all of this!!!

Seriously wants to bitch-slap someone,
Awkward Turtle

Sad and Lonely Otter.

I really miss Blue Fox.

He talks to other people on Facebook but he doesn't text me or call me back. Dude, this is really making me sad. I want to hear his voice again but why is he being so busy but can't even text me back~ :(

kjfklsjdlfjsljfdsjfd;skjfds;lfjds

Sad,
Otter

We'll Miss Your Imagination, Steve Jobs.

Oh, man. I've been an Apple-Mac fan since I can remember. Most of the computers that we've owned throughout my life was by Apple. So when I was seeing articles saying that Steve Jobs died, I scoffed at it and thought it was a joke because I knew there were mean people out there who like to make hype out of people's death.

But this was real.

I saw it on CNN later that night when I started to see rumors that it was real. It was really weird because I knew that he was suffering from cancer and other health problems but I didn't think he'd pass away so early... I knew he had envision so much more for Apple but when he passed his CEO-position to Tim Cook, I knew something might be wrong.

And then this. So sad.

I was even thinking of switching my choice of an iPhone to a Samsung Android. Silly me, now I might just get an iPhone to remember Steve Jobs. :( lol.

Siiiiiigh,
Otter

RIP Steve Jobs

 I've never owned a Mac, iPad or iPhone (though I use my mom's iPhone once in awhile), but the death of a true visionary who had such strong influence on the world came quite a shock to me and my friends.

 One of my friends, Cass, announced his death to us while surfing the net at the school library. We didn't want to believe her until she showed us the web page.

AKSJDVFIO;GVJIOJDO

This is nearly the same shock I felt upon learning that Michael Jackson died.

 While we contemplated his death, one of my friends wondered if his coffin will be fashioned like an iPhone, along with the "slide to unlock" feature if you want to see Steve.

LOL-ing,
Awkward Turtle

I Miss You Terribly.

Sigh. This loneliness is seriously eating me inside...

I miss Blue Fox like crazy but I know he's super busy, tired and all of that. I just want to hear his voice again and have conversations like we use to but I know he'd be too tired for that.

I feel so lonely that I could cry... I just want to dig a hole in the bed, cover it with blankets, build a pillow fortress and just stay inside and just hibernate and not think of anything else.

I have nothing to distract me or keep me busy thus the reason why I want to keep on talking to Blue Fox but I don't want to seem like a bother. :(

I really don't know what to do...

Work out? Sigh.

Depressed,
Otter

Depression

I give up on my delusional love life.

Maybe I like him so much that I imagined our chemistry together.

Meh.


On the rocks,
Awkward Turtle

LOL, I miss you. SAD.

Me: (hugs Blue Fox)
Blue Fox: You are so spoiled! (laughs)
Me: What? You're mine, I can hug you all I want...
Blue Fox: Nope. Not unless you don't get your running shoes by tomorrow...
Me: What? That's unfair!
Blue Fox: Mwahahahaha...

I love you,
Otter

PS: I got it by the due date so, yeah. He and his heart is mine.

Finally, updates!

I don't even know where to begin...

Hours before I left Maryland, Blue Fox was arguing with his roommate on how I would get to the airport, but his roommate was saying that if he does drop me off, I have to pay $50! Which I don't have enough if I'm going to be traveling on my own. Since that wasn't going to happen, he basically told me to take the damn bus! I had to wake up at 5am just for this. Blue Fox can't drop me off at the airport because at 5am, he has to get ready for ROTC. And yes, he can't get off that because since he slacked so much last semester, he almost got kicked out and he really wants this so he's trying to show commitment. I was sad that I had to leave. So, we both woke up together and before I was going to leave, he hugged me. A really long hug and I told him, "Don't worry, I'm coming back~" and he said, "Mhm, just fix all the things you need to first..." and he also told me to text and call often. Sigh.

The night before I left, as well, I asked him to tell me how he feels because apparently, he's not telling me and he didn't want to express it because he feels weak but I got it out of him.

Serendipity/Destiny

 Yesterday, I was bored off my ass so I decided to look up my friends' numerology charts. As I was comparing my chart with Hottie's, he texted me out of the blue. He said he found my sketchpad at the school's art department library.

GOOD GOD. I didn't even realize it was missing 'til he told me!

Then I remembered that I was at that library with Aslan, and I was making notes with my sketchpad, and I must've left it in my hurry to catch the train with Spam. So I was thrilled to my toes that it was Hottie who spotted it, of all people! He said he found it on one of the book carts. Which is weird coz most people usually put stuff at the Lost & Found department. He even added, "it's funny coz I told myself it looked familiar." So he asked me if it was alright he'll keep my sketchpad so he could give it to me next time we meet up.

Of course he can! You know what else he could keep?? My heart!!

Swimming in lily pad 9,
Awkward Turtle

*Rolling on floor trying to contain screams of joy*

Yesterday, I had Hottie's notebook with me so I could return it to him in case he had free time. So I texted him around lunchtime to let him know I was just around the campus if he has time to get it from me. I left it at that.

 While I was at the library with Spam and Kitty, and a few hours later, he texted out of the blue saying he was at just at the school's accounting area and asked where I was. I nearly died and had to keep myself from being all fangirl mode coz I didn't want any of the library staff to kick me out.

 "OMG HE'S IN SCHOOL AND HE WANTS TO KNOW WHERE I AM!" I mouthed to Spam while trying not to eject from my seat with excitement.

Spam said, "looks like we've topped our quotas for this week!" LOLOLOL

So I had to keep myself from getting too excited when he finally arrived. He had his haircut. I hate his haircut but he still look gorgeeeouuuus. *heart fluttering*

Spam and Kitty had to go to their classes, but not before they attempted to take a video of me and Hottie talking about the possible concepts of my music vid. Hottie spotted them trying to act casual with their camera phones, so he used his folder to block them from us. Muffled laughter ensued.

When Spam and Kitty left, you can just imagine me burning up to my ears. Oh, Hottie, why you so perfect?? I had him all to myself for more than 2 hours!

Walking on cloud 9,

Awkward Turtle

I Can't Stay, Apparently.

Here's the hard part that I didn't want to talk about now...

Remember when I said that I had a feeling that I was making things awkward in the house? Well, I'm correct. The reason why all the boys in the house were in the other room for such a long time was because they were talking to Aaron about how much longer I'm going to have to stay because they thought I was only here for the weekend. He didn't tell his roommates that I was staying for a while, thinking that it's going to be okay because one roommate tends to have his girlfriend over from time to time as well so he planned it on his own without telling his roommates ahead of time: His mistake.

He didn't talk to me about it until last night when I came home at about 5pm, after getting maps and bus routes to find a job slightly outside Towson University. I come home, find the roommates and friends in the living room playing video games. I walk into the bedroom to change and he goes, "We need to talk." and I'm like, "Sure" thinking that I already know what's going to happen or what we're going to talk about and he goes, "You can't stay here anymore..." and we talked about it and he told me that his roommates are staying to feel uncomfortable that I'm here for so long and that I'm being of a slight distraction with him and his school work and Army ROTC. Since I'm around, he only wants to be with me and whatnot but he has to sleep and do so many other things, so he isn't doing as good in training in the morning and has to work extra hard and he missed a quiz in his psychology class and he has a ton of work to do.

Yee-haw

Sorry I haven't been updating! Bad Turtle! Bad!

Truth is, there isn't really happening in my life... unlike OTTER here who has been making AMAZING DEVELOPMENTS in her love life. Kudos to you and Blue Fox! I envy you guys!

So I did this little experiment  last week wherein I totally stopped texting Hottie to see if he'll take the initiative to text me.

For five days... NOTHING.

Apparently, he won't text unless I text him first.

Yeah, it's depressing. It's like... he was just being nice to me all this time. HNNNGH.


And now for my life outside my love life:
I've been hanging out with Aslan a lot and he gave me a digital copy of the entire first season of Game of Thrones. I just started watching it yesterday and now I'm ADDICTED.
Spam is still trying to get over her crush, Spencer. A futile attempt, at that.

Otter, we should post more pictures in this blog.

Spacing out,
Awkward Turtle

Couple-y... Postponed.

Now that Blue Fox and I are officially boyfriend and girlfriend, I was feeling a little sad that I couldn't be able to show it off. I changed my Facebook status to "in a relationship" (I didn't even tag him in it) and he was telling me (on the phone) that I should take it off and not show it to people "just yet" because he's not suppose to be in a relationship at the moment since he made a promise to his mom that he wouldn't be in a relationship until he graduates and yes, he told me this ahead of time but since we're together, we just couldn't help it and just ended up in a relationship but we have to be hush-hush about it.

And  then he said, "I don't know why you want to tell everyone" and I said, "Is it bad to tell everyone?" and he said, "Well, no but just not yet"

So I have to wait to tell people about it... Siiiiiiigh.

I guess us being more couple-y will have to be postponed.

It almost makes me sad. :( bleh.

And now he's telling me that I have to wake up at 5am, run around campus and then come back home at around 8am (around the time he comes home from Army ROTC-PT). This is what you get when you have a health-nut boyfriend.

You're Too Playful. I Hate You.

I love it when you kiss me before you leave for PT at 5am and when you come back home at around 8am, you shower your sweaty self, come back into the room, find me still sleeping and you kiss me again. You crawl back into bed with me, wrap your arms around me, kiss me and take a nap before your next class at 11am. To be honest, I love that routine.

Now, three days ago, it was fine until you came back from PT. You kiss me and wake me up telling me that you need me to help you with something, I hesitate to come out of bed but since you needed me, I leave the room and find you in the living room but I wonder… Why is the shower on? You tell me, “Because I’m going to take a shower” but why are you in the living room?

You hold me by the waist, kiss me while moving me into the bathroom and you tell me that you want to shower with me. As shy as I am, I’ll say no but I’m giggling like shit in the inside. It’s 8am, everyone’s dead asleep and we’re being lovely with each other. I play around and tell you that I won’t do it but your aggressive playfulness picks me up and brings me into the shower fully clothed.

I’m soaked now, thanks to you.

I keep repeating, “I hate you” but my heart is melting as you kiss me, smiling and giggling. Even though I’m soaked, hearing you giggle and seeing you smile at me was enough and hearing you tell me you love me… Took me away.

I’m trying really hard not to fall in love with you.

Clothes off, shower ongoing and hearts fluttering.

Showering together, mission accomplished.

Gabe Bandoc - Treat You Good

To: Blue Fox

From: Otter

WAIT, WAIT, WAIT!

I was cleaning up the apartment, throwing things away and cleaned up the kitchen and you know what? Connor cleaned up his clothes! THEY'RE ALL IN THE HAMPER! Woot! Well, his pants are still on the floor but still. LOL. Now, the apartment is looking better now that I've cleaned it up a bit and made all the papers stacked together neatly.

Just saying. Haha.

Satisfied,
Otter

Typical Boys.

As much as I get along with boys/guys more than I do with girls/ladies, living in a house filled with guys is... Different. Since I'm so use to living on my own, everything would be organized, neatly put away and I'm dead clean and spotless. So ever since I came here, everything's the opposite.

All the guys leave their clothes on the floor, backpacks on the floor, nothing's folded, nothing's really put away and things are just everywhere and I think the dishes were just stacking up for the last two days and no one noticed it. I was going to do it but I was looking for jobs online but Blue Fox came home and said, "Geez, you didn't do the dishes?" and I was about to say, "Geez, why do you leave everything on the floor unfolded and just leave it there without fixing it? And you're always walking around the house in your boxers like you have no clothes..."

Yes. By the time Blue Fox comes home, he puts everything on the floor and takes off his clothes (which ends up on the floor too) and walks around the house in his boxers, cooks in his boxers and everything else you can think of. He even sleeps like that.

But I cleaned up a bit, put all the water bottles in the recycle bin and threw away all the nasty stuff in the house. Finally, had the dishes dried and put away. It's cleaner but I think I'll leave their clothes on the floor... I'm sure they're fully aware that they have a clothes bin in their rooms but for some reason, the clothes are not IN the clothes bin/hamper. Lol, sigh... Boys.

OCD,
Otter

PS: Nooooooo, Conner left me! Now, I'm alone in the apartment again. Sigh. Lol. He has a 20-page paper to do and it's due next week so he's off to the library. Oh well, I'll see him later tonight anyways. Ryan should be coming home from work anyways... Haha.

Twitching, Farting and Drooling

Last night, I was a little worried why Blue Fox wasn't coming to bed, usually he would be asleep by 10pm or something and be sleeping in the bedroom but last night, he and his roommates were in the other room, talking and I had no idea what they were talking about and they were there for hours! So I went to bed at about 10:30pm since they all left me in the living room by myself but I only slept until 11:30pm. Blue Fox came into the bedroom for a couple seconds to find me "sleeping" and then left, and then I think when he went out they were talking about me, how long am I staying, what am I going to do and things like that and I heard Blue Fox say something like he'll have me try and find a job or he'll help me find a job, either one so... That's when the awkwardness heightened for me. I just stayed under the covers for hours... It's 1am and Blue Fox isn't coming to bed and I'm actually worried because he's not even replying to my text messages about if he's coming to bed or not.

It's Official... YAY!

For some reason, I started thinking "when will I be Blue Fox's girlfriend?" because he hasn't quite asked me so one night, I told him, "I'm not quite you're girlfriend..." and he said, "what makes you think that you're not my girlfriend?" and I told him, "because you haven't asked me yet." and he said, "you know what? You're right. I didn't ask you. I just always assumed that when you came here that you were already my girlfriend and everyone here (roommates and close friends) know that you are. But I forgot that I didn't even ask you... I'm sorry."

He first said, "Be my girlfriend." and I said, "Are you telling me or asking me?" and he said, "Will you or may you be my girlfriend?" and I said, "yes" - It's official baby!

But now I'm confused, should I count it as the day that I came (since he assumed) or should I count it on the day he asked me? Haha, I don't know.

Sadly, he's at work until Sunday so I won't get to see him until Sunday afternoon or Sunday night so I'm with the roommates until then. A little awkward but maybe I can use this chance to get to know them... I need to overcome my shyness.

So now that Conner came back home, we're watching "Breaking Bad" together and i'm trying to look for a job and he's just... Doing what he does. Haha.

Stay or Move Out and Updates

I haven't blogged in a while and I finally know how it feels to not really blog. It feels a little weird.

Anyways, so I'm four days in and I like it but I feel like me being here is making things awkward around here. I mean, living in with roommates all of a sudden could be a burden, almost I think... That's one of the reasons why I was a little hesitant to come here because I knew I'd be with him and his roommates and I wasn't sure how they would be liking the idea.

I feel like I make things awkward here because I don't attend the university so I'm just... Staying here. I need to step up my game in finding a job though.

I've been feeling this way since the night I came here and now, I'm thinking that I can't stay...

September 19th, 2011 - Maryland Bound

I'm finally in Maryland! And I have to tell you, the moment I got on that plane from Seattle, it was just so intense! I was so nervous, scared, excited, worried but I loved the rush. I'm not quite sure why I was going to postpone this! Anyways, my flight to Seattle was a little boring, I was up until 3AM and I couldn't sleep on the plane because I was filled with so much emotions... And then when I reached Philadelphia at around 2:00pm, Blue Fox called me and asked where I was and I was glad to hear from him on the phone... It helped my three hour lay over go by faster but then I heard the intercom and said that my flight from Philadelphia to Maryland would only be 20~35 minutes! I was like, "Whaaaaaaaaat?!" so it was a short ride.

"I'll see you tomorrow" ♡

I have the address of Blue Fox's apartment and the mailing address. Woot! I'm excited. I texted him saying that he should sleep now because he has a PT test tomorrow in the morning so he has to wake up before 5am to get ready... But then, he called me for a little bit before he heads to bed.

Blue Fox: I was studying but now, I'm about to go to sleep because I have physical training tomorrow in the morning.
Otter: I know, that's why you should sleep now.
Blue Fox: Mhmm. For the mailing address, it could be different for you but it's different here? But! Do what you want. (laughs)
Otter: Fine, I'll do it your way...
Blue Fox: Mhmm...
Otter: Go sleep now.
Blue Fox: Okay...
Otter: Goodnight~
Blue Fox: I'll see you tomorrow...
(hangs up)

OMG, I SERIOUSLY CAN'T BELIEVE IT! WOOT!

See YOU tomorrow,
Otter

Blue Fox is Nervous? Wow.

Blue Fox: Are you nervous coming?
Otter: Very. I'm worried, nervous, scared, excited, happy and a little jittery.
Blue Fox: To be honest, three days ago, when you told me that you were coming... I was scared and nervous because you're coming so quickly but after five minutes, I got over it and I was excited.
Otter: Awwww...
Blue Fox: Half of me is guilty for pushing you to come so early but the other half of me is like "Yessss! She's finally coming~!"

I'll be picked up by him and his roommate. I'm scared, worried, nervous and happy at the same time.

I'm so jittery right now... I feel like I'm going to throw up butterflies.

ASDLKFJSDKLFJLDFLAS,
Otter

Up and Packing...

I've been trying to pack since Friday night. Blue Fox keeps asking me, "Are you done packing?" and I keep saying no because I realized, I'd be over-weight for one whole bag. So, I'm bringing only one (the black one) and then I'll have the other one sent to me when I have the money or I'll go and pick it up or something... I don't know yet...

Blue Fox: Are you done packing?
Otter: No. Haha.
Blue Fox: How many bags are you bringing?
Otter: One.
Blue Fox: That's it?
Otter: Well...
Blue Fox: Well...?
Otter: I'm leaving some stuff. I'll be over-weight.
Blue Fox: What? No. Bring all of it.
Otter: It's too much. Do you know how much I'll be paying for being over-weight? And plus... It'll freak you and your roommates out.
Blue Fox: Bring it all. Don't worry about the money. I made room in my wide closet... You have half a closet to yourself and a whole drawer to yourself. In my closet, I'm using less than half, actually. The rest you can use.
Otter: We're sharing drawers and closets?
Blue Fox: Mmm, yes.

OMG, WE'RE SHARING DRAWERS!

Blue Fox: Did you have sweaters?
Otter: Yeah, but not heavy jackets though... I know it'll snow soon.
Blue Fox: Mhm. That's fine. You can use my sweaters...

OMG, WE'RE BORROWING SWEATERS!

My Blue Fox and Soonja

It's Blue Fox and baby Soonja (an all-white female pitbull with one brown ear flap)

Otter: Would you be surprised if you were my display picture on my phone?
Blue Fox: No. But I'd be jealous if Soonja was your display picture.
Otter: Well, then be half jealous...
Blue Fox: What?! Grrr. I have to go home and hit her for being so cute. I'll tell her, "Soonja, why do you have to do be so cute?"
Otter: Awwwwww, nooooo~ (laughs)

I do love the both of you guys though~ :)

Teehee,
Otter

Artists, Geeks, and Disney

So last Saturday, after class, Aslan and I met up. Apparently, he was suppose to have class but the teacher didn't show up. So we both went to MOA to go to the 32nd international book fair and then catch up with his brother, and friends somewhere there.

 The book fair was a bit disappointing but Aslan's friends and his brother were AWESOME. They're all weird, intellectual, funny, random, geeky and artistic and they're into New Age stuff. One of them can read palms and another can regress to her past lives. They're my type of crowd and Aslan was pleased that I got along with them reeeeally well. According to him, they just love me. Well, I love them!

Speaking of love....

Sigh. Anyway, nothing really new with my artist, Hottie. We still text and he's still... gorgeous. *cartwheels* Everyday we still update each other with 3 things we're grateful for. There was one time that I went to the other building to find art books for my next artwork. After finding the book, I went out to the empty hallway and- holy cow- there was Hottie on his way to the library.

For some reason we were both so surprised to see each other. We talked only for a minute coz I had to go home. When I was out of sight, I had a BIIIIIIIIIIIIG SMILE on my face and I just wanted to skip home on cloud 9. Seriously, I felt sparks. Well, could be me. But I don't care!! When I asked for his gratitude update, the first one was, "I'm grateful that we bumped to each other earlier."

YIIIIEEEEEE!!!

alksjdhan fvhduriv hguimlsdjkfhafff!!

Good GOD.

Floating on pond 9,
Awkward Turtle